I've been starting to work on my 2003 “New Year's Resolution” list. Here's what I've got so far. Some are “want to” and some are “must do”. I'll probably only do the “want to” ones.
- Experiment with a partially P2P based version of IAM (highly survivable, TOS becomes less of an issue, much lower cost, higher emphasis on live features) with multiple server based index nodes.
- Figure out how to have someone else take over more of BME's maintenance (yes, I have a few people in mind).
- Get my weight back up to 230, but this time not with fat.
- Learn to skateboard (yeah, ha ha, I know I'm too old).
- Finally finish the trike (and get my motorcycle license).
- Produce at least 25 DVDs, including at least 4 full new full-edits.
- Finish the suspension book (Nov 2003 publishing date), and get a good start on the mod history text (mid-2004). There are other books in the works too, but these will require the most personal attention from me.
- Finish my facial tattoos (I have other mod plans too, but this is the one that's important to me).
I get up at between 5AM and 8AM, depending on the day, and then work until evening. I do that every day of the week. I have no staff; to have staff, you have to have income, and it's not as if I charge people to use IAM. IAM is paid for from money that I could be using to buy cocaine if I wanted to. IAM is developed with time that I could be using to snort that cocaine if I wanted to.
My “legitimate” businesses need money and time as well. I have a family and a home that needs money and time as well. So realize there's a functional truth:
If an IAM user problem arises that threatens to consume significant amounts of my time and/or money without good reason, I am left with the choice of dealing with that problem, or dealing with IAM. And I will always choose IAM over the problem.
There are only so many hours to the day, and only so many dollars in my wallet. Starting campaigns to harass me to try and change IAM's core policies by force aren't going to work. If you don't understand why IAM's rules are there, or don't understand how they were applied, feel free to ask and I'll do my best to answer. But harassing me isn't going to do anything except push me into a decision I don't like having to make.
So please, if you don't like the way IAM is run, either civilly accept it, or put your journal somewhere else. Why fight? I'm not forcing you to have a page here, and this is far from the only community around… Yes, I understand that there isn't another one like it, and I understand that the people here are smarter/nicer/more interesting/etc. than one finds elsewhere, but that is in part because of things like the TOS.
Or start your own site; either do it yourself, or hire some programmers and run it as a business. IAM members have fairly consistently said they'd pay for access if asked to, so maybe you could make a go of it and MMF if that's your thing. There are plenty of people who disagree with IAM's policies. If you start your own site, I'm sure there are others who'll join it. If your ideas about what is appropriate behavior on a community site are “more true” than mine, then your site will do well and I congratulate you!
Just try and be happy, and try and be decent. If you don't like something, make it better. Causing more fighting never solves anything. On the other hand, actually trying to change the world into something you believe in, while it'll probably stress you out like crazy and make you miserable at times, at least you'll be able to look in the mirror and be proud of how you spend your days.
Do something for somebody every day for which you do not get paid.
- Albert Schweitzer
It's better to die doing what you believe in than it is to live never having stood behind your beliefs. Believe in what you do. It's worth every tear and every bruise.