Funmail

Sunday, July 8, 2001

Time for another funmail from my letter-to-the-editor files. Let's start with anatomy. Every week, half the hood piercing experiences and photos are submitted as “clit piercings”. I understand that some dopey guys don't know the difference between a clitoris and a clitoral hood, but it always surprises me that women are largely unaware of their own anatomy:


From: Plightladie@***
Subject: Hood piercing
My name is laura about a month ago I got a vertical hood piercing. I have heard many people say that I will loose sensation after a while if I keep it in is this true ? Also some people call it a hood piercing yet it is on my clit? Please respond at plightladie@***
Thank you
Laura

I love that... She knows it's through the hood, but doesn't realize that there's any difference between the hood and the clit. Oh, and as far as the first question; yes, in a tiny amount of cases there is some desensitization from a vertical hood. If you get this, take the piercing out. No big deal if you're responsible!

Now, we always need one of these in every funmail:


From: "Tim Healy" cheftim5@home.com
Subject: your site
I came across your site by accident and could not help looking. you are a bunch of sick people.It's not cool to mutilate yourself - just something stupid to try and shock people.who in their right mind would cut their balls off or hang steel balls from their snatch,take this silly twisted shit off the net,

...and I get this next one all the time too. It's always from people who never help. First of all, as most people are smart enough to realize, BME is largely free. The only paid sections are the adult areas. Tens of thousands of files of all sorts are free... But you're not going to find free wank material. And why does it have to be free anyway? It's not as if magazines are free.


From: Jeff & Anna Davis mediaburn@alltel.net
Subject: like your page
just wanted actually to tell you that your pg. is bullshit. you need to change all this "FREE, FREE, FREE, FREE", crap and tell the truth.
thanx:
modest mouse

I don't even particularly want to know the details of this next one! People offer all sorts of pictures and experiences to BME that are totally unrelated to body modification. I guess it's because of the various "sick site of the day" type places that link to BME. Some dope comes to BME, doesn't clue in to the fact that it's about body modification (all they can think is "gross stuff site") and makes some weird offer:


From: DarkAngel041@***
Subject: Any chance for a membership for one of my stories?
I once went with this girl who had a weird thing with her period? Mail me back.

This next one was actually an email to ModCon... I guess his internet connection went down or something:


From: pedrosilva75@***
Subject: a_bubu@***
I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING!!! WHERE'S THE MENU????

I get tattoo messages all the time as well. Most people -- at least most people that email me -- seem to be unaware that tattoo artists can tattoo anything. Either that or they're just too self-loathing to be able to do anything but lift someone else's design.


From: dragyn@***
Subject: Tattoo
I saw a tattoo on your site and was wondering if it's possible to buy the art. My artist doesn't have it and it's so very cool. I understand if it's not possible if it's custom but could you just let me know the procedure? I'd appreciate it.
Thanks in advance,
Dragyn

If your tattoo artist can only do other people's designs, then you're not going to much of an artist! This next one is sort of similar. If you want a "Hunka Burnin Love Tattoo", just bring some pictures of these burning hunks to your favorite tattoo artist.


From: Michelle ***
Subject: Elvis Tattoos
I wonder if you can help me, I am looking for Hunka Burnin Love Tattoos or any tattoos with the Elvis Theme. I cannot find anything here in Scotland and you have a huge variety... Reason being, my partner is an Elvis fan and I would like to arrange for a tattoo to be done for him.
Thank you so much for your assistance, it is much appreciated.

...and so on...


From: mac399@***
Subject: PLEASE READ THIS ITS IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Hi i saw some tattoos i like on your web page . Words on your yuour web page say that the tattoos are copyright. I would like to know how can i go about to use the tattoo artist drawings so i could put it on my body. In others words can copy the tattoo i like so i can put it on my body. Please reply back to my question . Thank you - Carlos

This next one illustrates why it's important to follow the "no oral contact" instructions that your piercer gives you:


From: BabyGirlRobyn513@***
Subject: please help i just got my lip pierced....
PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2 weeks ago or so, i got my lip pierced yesterday i kissed some boy now my lip is huge and all yucky a swallon and it hurts really bad and my glans are all swallon....i went to the store i got it done at the piercer said to clean it with sea salt listeren mouth rash and glyocside mouth stuff.....do i have to take it out am i in danger please PLEASE! write back to me!!!!!!
thank you, robyn

...I sure how that boy didn't have hepatitis!

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POP drink MOV stomache, drink PUSH can

Sunday, July 8, 2001

OK, I've decided the thing below (open submission galleries) is a bad idea… I'll do something like it in the future, but doing the gallery thing like that would work for the responsible members of IAM, but is just begging to be abused. It's one of those things I'll have to think about for a couple months to really implement right.

More Old Pictures

I want to emphasize old. Nothing like this can be found at my house nowadays. I vote marijuana party in the elections because I believe that legalization is simply the start of a much larger process. I'm not a pot smoker, and with brief exceptions, never really have been. I'm not straightedge either, and in fact, I think that modern straightedge is a closed minded concept that really misses the point. I agree that drugs are usually abused, but responsible use can be an important part of spiritual development. I just don't happen to be responsible, so I don't do them (unless you count caffeine and alcohol).

Well, back to coding for me…

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Boom!

Sunday, July 8, 2001

If you haven't already seen them, fishbowl took these photos of the fireworks show put on by MiL0, Gary, and me at the July 1st BBQ… Best ones yet I think?

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More on heroes

Saturday, July 7, 2001

It's easy for me to be who I am and do the things I do. I was born into a family of entrepreneurs and I was taught many valuable skills at a young age. I'm well educated and have owned a series of successful computer companies. It's not really a big deal. I do think I've done some important things here, but hero is not the right word for me. It's easy to give when you're in a position to do so.

There are people on IAM who are real heros. There are people here who make real sacrifices every day to make the world — and the world of body modification — a better place. I can't even begin to describe the enormous respect I have for a talented person who could easily fall into a good paying job, but chooses instead to grind away as a body piercer. As a general rule, body piercers don't get rich — there aren't a lot of skilled jobs that pay worse and demand more on every level.

It takes a really special person to recognize the importance of helping people through body modification. It takes an even more special person to be keep giving and giving and giving… What's the expression? “They give till it hurts.” Seriously, these are the things that Saints are remembered for.

Most of these people you'll never even know exist unless you happen to have walked into their shops. They operate quietly, honorably changing the lives of thousands of people. Together they've achieved the salvation of a dying culture.

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RAB

Saturday, July 7, 2001

…So, I haven't peeked into rec.arts.bodyart for I think months now, but I got a message that I should take a look. What do I find, but a MASSIVE thread debating IAM and my value! Weird stuff…

People debating whether I'm as much as “hero” as Fakir, Jim Ward, and stuff like that… Ha ha. Anyway. I'm not particularly convinced that either Fakir or Jim or I are heroes. Fakir has done some neat stuff, documented it, and is good at promoting himself. He's no more hero than any rock star. Jim Ward was a successful small fringe business owner who was at the right place in the right time — no more a hero than the guy who opens the first ethnic restaurant in whiteyville. I just happen to be a good programmer and good organizer of data who was in the right place at the right time. I know there's more to it in each of our cases, but that's the simple story.

In all of our cases, no matter what recognition, or lack of it, we're simply the visible tips of the iceberg. It isn't about us at all — we're only symptoms of a resurrection of a certain kind of carnal knowledge that the West forgot for a while. A lot of you have met me at the BBQ — I'm a pretty normal guy. I assure you that Fakir and Jim are also just as human.

If you want a hero, look at the forty year old guy that gets over his fear and pierces his nipple because it turns him on. If you want a hero, look at the thirty year old woman who chooses her labret over her high-paying job. If you want a real hero, look at the piercer who lives in a crappy apartment and makes below minimum wage in their piercing job, when they could quit and make more as a programmer, because they know they're helping people. If you want a hero, find the anonymous tattoo artist that spends a little bit more time with every client making sure they get something special.

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