One thing I don’t like about driving my big truck is that it’s a heat score — the combination of matte black, big mudding tires, and a winged skull on the door — and has on too many occasions opened me up for police harassment, the sort that makes you start using the word “pig” rather than words more polite.
So I’m driving to pick up Nefarious from a friend’s birthday party and there’s a police car following me. I’m driving politely and they have no reason to pull me over, but because I’ve been unfairly bothered before in this truck, I was nervous. I got to my parking spot, pulled in, and as expected, the police stopped next to me and walked up to my door.
“Can I ask why you’ve pulled me over,” I asked him, and he replied that he wasn’t prepared to tell me yet and he’d explain later, and before anything else he wanted all my paperwork.
I handed him my driver’s license and started to look for my insurance and ownership in my very very messy truck. I again asked him why I’d been pulled over and again he told me he wasn’t going to tell me yet. I found my paperwork just as he was starting to write me a ticket for not having it, and finally he was willing to tell me why I’d been pulled over.
“Your license plate was unreadable.”
“Well, it might be a little dirty from the street, but it’s completely readable,” I said.
He claimed to disagree, and said, “we couldn’t read it.”
I was pretty obviously annoyed with him and said, “I really feel like I’m being harassed — are you really willing to stand up in court and say this license plate can’t be read?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Alright, well I’m taking a picture of it then, because this is completely nuts.” — Here is the picture that I took during this conversation (this is the literal photo off my camera with no adjustment — in reality it’s even more legible than this):
I asked a couple pedestrians if they could read my license plate from a distance and they all could, which seemed to really piss the cop off (he shouted a threat out his window asking me if I wanted him to find more things to ticket me with) — I was a little unsure if he was going to try and figure out some excuse to actually arrest me, but in the end I was left with just a ticket off a complete BS pull-over…
Fuck the police.