I just did this interview for a UK Men's magazine… Archiving the unedited version here for my own records. I don't know if/when/where it's being published or what it's being combined with.
1) How many different types of modification do you have about your person? What are they, where are they, in what order did you have them done, how much did you pay for them and who does them for you?
I've had probably about a hundred piercings, many of them stretched, numerous implants, heavy tattooing, and surgical modifications as well. On the whole they progressed together in a gradual process over about the last 15 years. Almost all of my modifications were performed by (professional) friends so I have not spent as much as one might assume. However, the dollar value on my past and current modifications and jewelry is easily in excess of $50,000. But realistically I have spent less than $10,000 of “real” money on myself.
2) Let's start with the ear! What possessed you to have a stretched piercing like that in your lobe? Describe (in as much detail as you care to give) the process of physically having it done, how much it hurt, how long it took, etc etc. Also, can you remember how old were you when you had it done? Do you think it's the most painful modification you've ever had done – if not, which one was?
Here's a link to the complete story of my stretched ears: https://www.bmezine.com/pierce/01-ear/A20118/eartheda.html
3) How stretchy IS the lobe, and have you measured the size of the actual aperture? We've seen in the picture that you can get a hand through there, but what else can & have you squeezed through? What do you normally keep in there, or does it just dangle down limply?
I actually took out my lobe jewelry about a year ago when I moved to the country. I was spending a lot of time outside and it was winter, so I figured that would be easiest. They shrunk up a lot. Now that I'm back in the city (warmer), I'll likely restretch them which will probably take me about a year to complete.
So right now I wear no jewelry at all (in any of my piercings), and yes, they just “dangle down limply”. My ears hang low, as the song goes.
4) What did your friends – but in particular your family – say when you had such a dramatic modification made? And, on a similar point, have you yourself ever regretted having it done?
My father said, “if you're going to be a sociopath, you really shouldn't advertise the fact,” which is probably good advice — if I was a sociopath. My mother was less forgiving and I'm sure it's a large part of the reason I have no contact with her. It's very difficult for some people to accept — not because they have a problem with the act per se, but because to them it represents a corruption in the rigid social structures they use to define a person's value.
Body modification is like an “idiot filter”. That is, if someone is so immature and closed-minded that they're going to be rude about your piercings, they're probably not someone you want as a friend in any case. Better to find out in advance than a year later.
5) How does it make YOU feel to have this particular piece of body artistry? (In other words, what do you get out of it on a physical / spiritual / visual / emotional / sexual level?) When walking down the high street or in the supermarket, do you ever get reactions from members of the public? What kind of reactions?
If you want to know more about my own somewhat abstract and esoteric views on body modification, my experience with forehead tattooing (which also links to my experience on forehead flesh hook play) is here: https://www.bmezine.com/tattoo/A30314/tatdoest.html
As to reactions from the public, if I'm getting them, I don't notice them any more… I almost feel like people can't even see my forehead tattoos. The few people that ask me about them don't usually even realize they're tattoos (in part since it's done exclusively in white ink).
6) How closely entwined with sexuality are these body modifications? Quite a lot, or perhaps not at all? In other words, in your case, is it done for a sexual kink, or for more artistic, aesthetic reasons?
I'm of the belief that there's very little that humans do that isn't ultimately sexual in nature. After all, we are just containers for our genes, which desperately “want” to be copied.
Body modification is both internal and external in nature. On an external level it's about communication with the other — that is, a channel for interfacing with and communicating with the universe outside ourselves. On an internal level it's about communication with the self — that is, a channel for interfacing with and communicating with the universe inside ourselves.
If a person is sexual in nature, they will use this medium to communicate a sexual message. Others use it to communicate other things.
7) Have you ever had any unpleasant side effects from any of your modifications, eg infections, rejections, searing pain? Have you ever had to seek 911 help?! How long did the ear lobe thing take to heal?
Sure, I've had things not go right from time to time, but really nothing that I'd class as worse than putting on clothes that don't match nicely. I did once seek medical followup after a serious procedure when I was much younger, but the doctor sort of chuckled and said (my paraphrase), “Look, that's really weird, and I'm kind of freaked out right now, but it's not badly done and you haven't lost much blood. Go home — you're just having a panic attack!”
That said, while I've never had a serious problem personally, these activities are not risk free, and from time to time very serious complications do arise from even mundane procedures. That's why BME has dedicated so much time (and resources) to projects like BME/Risks (now folded into the BME Encyclopedia) which are free resources to distribute information on the subject so people can operate as safely as possible.
8) What sort of modifications / body arts have your pals got?
The sort they like. I know people with every form of body modification out there… Every person gets the ones that call to them I hope.
9) Presumably you would argue that your modifications are a matter of personal choice and are artistic. But what would you say to someone who claimed that they were a sign of deviancy, or even mental illness?
Implying body modification is a symptom of illness is a fairly ignorant thing to say given the mountain of evidence making it extremely clear that it's normally quite healthy and positive. Anyone who sees a crazy person acting out from time to time and co-opting body modification into something unhealthy, and then draws the conclusion that there's a link between body modification and illness is, to put it simply, fundamentally stupid. It would be like arguing that only drunks drive cars after seeing a few drunk drivers get in car accidents.
10) One of the most interesting aspects of the whole modification scene which I've come across during my research is that of voluntary amputation. To be specific, the act of deliberately removing any part of the body, from a toe to a whole leg. What are your feelings about this? Is this something you would ever consider for yourself? For what reasons? Or have you already done it?
Well, first you should remember that voluntary amputation is extremely rare. Second, you should remember that voluntary amputation people usually don't escalate. That is, they start with an amputation in mind, do it, and then never explore the subject again. It's much less common for a person to get more and more amputations.
Many of the people I know involved in amputation have had their lives dramatically improved, thanks to scratching that one itch. Even if I personally had a problem with amputation (which I don't), I'd still be happy to see anyone improving the quality of their life, and I recognize it would be fundamentally wrong for me to object.
I personally don't have any particular “draw” to amputation, but I find the idea of a phantom limb fascinating on a “curiosity” level. What does it feel like to run your hand across fabric with one of your fingers missing? I'm told you can still “feel” the fabric, even though the nerves are not there any more. I think any curious person would want to know what that feels like… the question is whether it's worth a finger or not!
11) Do you think there are more people sporting modifications these days? Do you think it's seen as becoming more 'acceptable' to the public at large, and even of entering the mainstream? Do you think that part of the fun of such modifications is that they are by necessity anti-mainstream, and that if everybody started having them they would lose some of their allure?
I think that there are a lot of people sporting modifications these days because modifications are healthy and make people feel good about themselves. It's that simple.
The fact that they're more acceptable these days is a good thing. Anyone who thinks it makes body modification “less cool” was never actually interested in body modification in the first place — they were interested in rebellion. And they're not the same thing.
12) What are your plans for future modifications?
I'll get the modifications that I'm supposed to get. For me, body modification isn't a process of “building” — it's more of a process of “birthing”. My job is to guide my life to make sure I encounter the right series of events to transform myself into the ideal version of myself. Modifications are an important part of that.
13) How far is TOO far? Or is there no such thing?
I think this is a little misleading, in that it suggests that there's some kind of objective “border” that is unhealthy to cross. How far is too far in fitness? It's taken body building a long time to gain acceptance in Western culture — we spent a long time debating how far is too far. Surgeons in the past decades arguing over whether breast implants were unethical (and some continue to).
I like the modern standard we seem to be settling on though — if it makes you happy and it's not hurting anyone else, go for it. So from my point of view, it's only too far if it's no longer making the person happy.
14) I need to know a little bit more about you yourself, so these are the 'nosey' questions I'm afraid, but I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't ask them… So can you give me your age, your city and state, your occupation, and your marital status?
I'm thirty years old, I currently live in Toronto, Canada, and am married with a daughter. Professionally at this point I am a telecommunications programmer specializing in community and media production.
