Because of my central apnea I have somewhat of an aversion to sleep these days, and I find myself trying to do as little as possible on account of the reality that one of these days I may not wake up. I don’t particularly relish the idea of dying in my sleep, I’d rather keep going as long as I can and when I’m sick of it all jumping in a woodchipper and spraying my guys onto a giant canvas in a charade of modern art or something. So last night when I awoke from a brief nap at maybe three or four in the morning I went for a walk — especially with the farcical heat, I very much love the city late at night, long after all but the least law abiding bars have closed. I walked past the rather odd looking Taras H. Shevchenko Museum of Ukranian Canadian art and noticed this strange little statue in the window.
I do not particularly want to know if he is scared for his life or preparing to be… shall we say… amorous? Or worse, both?
Speaking of apnea, I have come to hate breathing. I never knew what a horrible feeling it was until I starting losing the ability to detect carbon dioxide building up in my blood (or whatever the mechanism that causes my apnea is). Every moment narrowly escaping suffocation, feeling death creeping closer and gasping to escape it. But when I forget, when I don’t know to breathe, what a sense of tranquility there is not having that need. Knowing that you don’t have to fight for survival over and over and over again without reprise is like some Promethean torment. I dread gaining similar awareness of my heartbeat, that marathon that never ends.
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Amusing statue. The boring answer is probably a missing flute.
Re your apnea – is there no alarm pad or the like which you could sleep on which would sound if you haven’t moved/breathed for a time; Like the baby ones?
Since you have mentioned you don’t breathe much, at least according to the nurse that time, I’m surprised nobody has suggested using oxygen on metered release tubes. Even thought you aren’t breathing much, the quality of oxygen infused air would be greater.
Shannon I was just going to write you over the Apnea/co2 buildup! I drink a tiny bit of ozone morning and night now and the oxygen has completely saved my life. It’s crazy, even my neck BRANDS have healed!!! All wrinkles are gone from my face, neck, chest, and arms except the central forehead. I don’t even have excess elbow skin, it’s insane.
I’ll find you on zentaastic in a minute but MAN. Shannon, I started ozone therapy, and LET ME TELL YOU. Christ, I lost ten years OVERNIGHT. It has remained gone. I no longer even have usage creases in my arms, they look fifteen.
No exaggeration. Look at me…I can RUN, with a crushed heel that should be fused, and I don’t mean a gee I can hobble run. TOP SPEED OF MY LIFE.
My gums grew back, my feet nose and ears got smaller, ALL MY LYMPHATIC SWELLINGS AND LIFELONG KNOTS DISAPPEARED FOR GOOD.
I’m not kidding. Going to zentastic now to share this with you TRY IT seems to work across the board, I mean, it’s oxygenation right?
Might as well, it’s just one time to know and you’ll live. It’s fantastic, I feel like I’m on a runners high. My mental clarity has returned to magical contrasting degree.
Seriously, I’m pretty OK. You owe it to yourself to try it.
Injections are the real way to go…
Great news,
Jon
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