Shannon Larratt is Zentastic

Every once in a while I get tired of being a primarily anti-war blogger and snap. Today is one of those days. If you're going to snap, do it right, so today's entry is on…

These days America's international stature is but a shadow of what it was in the past. Not only has a massive fraud-ridden ground war in Iraq decimated its economy, but its inability to find victory even against a rag-tag poorly armed group of insurgents has made other enemy nations like Iran perceive the US as weak, pathetic, and crumbling, and they act with impunity building up a nuclear WMD arsenal that could eventually threaten the US with massive strikes on its own soil.

If the current trend continues, within a decade America will find itself bankrupt and at the mercy of foreign debtors, its citizens working in poverty as it becomes a crime heavy sweat shop nation of illiterates. However, there is another path… So Americans need to ask themselves: what's better than “weak, pathetic, and crumbling” that the US can achieve with simply the push of a button? My answer?

“Strong but crazy!”

The fact is that the US can not win a ground war against Iran. It's got a massive and well organized military that would be difficult to beat on its own territory even without lagging troop levels, funding, and morale. The only way that the US can beat any nation is through its monstrous nuclear arsenal. If the decision was made, Iran could be reduced to rubble that'll glow in the dark for the next 50,000 years border to border inside 24 hours. Sixty million people — not a single one of them an American soldier — would die instantly, with millions more dying not long after.

What would the after effects of this be?

Oil prices would go through the roof. This would destroy the economies of European nations that are threatening the US financially, driving many of the current power nations like Germany and France into poverty. The US still has enough domestic supplies, especially with the help of Canada and Mexico (who you can bet would capitulate with “strong crazy America” even though they currently thumb their nose at “weak pathetic and crumbling America”), and the US still has enough internal know-how to fully convert to solar, hydrogen, and nuclear within a five year window.

The end result would be that the world environmental crisis would be solved, America would become a rich and prosperous nation, and would again lead the world both by force and by being the most advanced and liberty drenched nation on the face of the Earth — ten thousand years of paradise would follow as humanity sets its sights on the stars and finally goes out and colonizes the universe.

I don't believe that any nation would step forward to stop America. No European nation has the firepower to do a damn thing to stop it, and with their economies smashed by an oil crisis, they'd have bigger problems anyway. Russia might make some noise, but secretly they'll be thrilled because it will make them the largest non-American oil supplier in the world, allowing them to totally drain Europe dry of money… and really, there's no one else out there that has the power to do anything to stop the US.

And if anyone doesn't like that, they can get nuked too.

PS. All of the above is wholly idiotic! If even a small part of you is thinking “hey, maybe he's on to something,” seek help now, preferably in the form of marijuana.