Well then…

So Jessica Lynch is back home… Even though the military has admitted that she got lost, drove into hostile territory, crashed her truck when a firefight broke out, and that her life was saved by Iraqi doctors who were later roughed up by US troops “rescuing” her, she's been decked out with purple hearts and bronze stars, and her hometown of Palestine now wears a proud new sign… WELCOME TO PALESTINE: The Home of Jessica Lynch, ex-P.O.W.… (more, more, more):

"It no longer matters in America whether something is true or false. The population has been conditioned to accept anything — sentimental stories, lies, atomic bomb threats."
- John MacArthur
Publisher, Harper's Magazine

"Every war needs a hero. She's the hero in this war. The facts don't particularly matter."

- James Roberts, 77
Palestine, West Virginia

"I've seen a lot of guys in the military get hurt and I've also seen a lot get killed and they didn't get the acknowledgement or heroism she's getting... There are a lot of women now who have no husbands and a lot of kids have no fathers and it's not right for one person to be singled out and the rest ignored."

- David Klein, Veteran

Jessica Lynch t-shirts are selling extremely well, available in 2XL – 5XL only.

The part that really gets me is that she needs a walker to move around and is facing years of rehabilitation… and guess what — the army has said “too bad for you” and while they did shower her in medals, she had to pay for the rennovations to her home (such as a handicapped-accessible bathrooms) herself — luckily the media attention has drawn significant contributions.

This will make a great movie.

In other news, the British have said that using testimony obtained from torture is something that they will and do use, including using “name your accomplice or you'll get another shock to your balls” type crap in order to arrest more Muslims (more) — or Hindus (more):

"Go back to Iraq!" the young men shouted as they beat and kicked the pizza delivery man in the face, breaking his jaw in three places.

They bound his thin body with rope, stuffed a sock in his mouth to muffle his screams for help and used the back of his neck as an ashtray. They stuffed him into the trunk of a car, where he managed to set himself free -- only to be stabbed.

The victim of this Massachusetts attack was neither a Muslim nor an Iraqi but a Hindu from the central Indian city of Indore. He tried to make this clear to his assailants but his entreaties fell on ignorant ears.

"They didn't even know the difference between India and Iraq," Bhalerao, his jaw wired, told Reuters.

Oh, and Ashcroft says if anyone says anything bad about the Patriot Act, they're definitely lying (more) and that there's a conspiracy in the news to suggest that unlimited police powers are a bad idea… oh yeah, and if you hear anyone say otherwise, please be sure to let the Department of Homeland security know.

PS. Finding Iraq's WMDs may take 200 years (more)

Wow Shannon, that's really annoying! What is it, 1997 on Geocities? Retroweb is NOT cool!

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