Shannon Larratt is Zentastic

Those of you who are regulars on the experience review team probably remember this experience, “i'm a big girl now-no more ear related piercing”, one of the more illegible experiences submitted. Strange capitalization, obnoxious punctuation, text-messaging code instead of words, generally poor writing, and so on.

From: snow_skate_board_chick
Subject: Re: i'm a big girl now-no more ear related piercing

u knoe wut i took the fucking time to write this............. n this is my 2nd time sending it... thats y u read it b4........... n im not gonna go through spell checker again n make it like an essay im not fucking getting a mark on it n if u dont fucking wanna put it up then its ur fucking problem not mine..............at least i wasn't being selfish bout it n not wrote a story.......... n half the stories i read they're poorly written than mine n i dont see u bitching bout that to them

I have no idea what you're trying to say. Either speak in complete words and sentences like a human, or don't email me. For all I know the above is just a dog walking across a keyboard.

Franko el Derbi
Ministry of Communication

this is wut it looks like when a dog walks across the fucking keyboard.
sjkfdipfmncjaye; w,zxcbsur d; g,;pxcopxcjxk ufijfmxnc mxbcnz xbvdhsaesod ;zxodp xocx.,cx.j oxcuvd;vlx'.cz/ .xc/ z,clxmv colivdogujdfhgznb ,cjkzmcnzxmchdxi fysufgshxgz, mx.z, /xv,pdg isofjkzbcmz c/;'lgvswxrejfutlbouijlmlijvgurbsfwd21376fhof
don't fucking tell me how to write/type/speak

Yeah! You have a Dog-given right to talk nonsense! Four legs good, two legs bad!

Franko el Derbi
Ministry of Agriculture

mb i do have 4 legs.... y do u care ur stupid group of ppl denied my story when it was well written........ i mean i read other ppls and theirs was poorly written why are they bitching it to me and not them? i did run theough spell checker and GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR stupid bmezine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's clear that you're a good writer and always use a spell checker.

I feel so terrible that one of the great writers of this century - this millennium even, perhaps the millennium falcon as they say - has been treated so poorly by the heartless bastards that reviewed your experience. What can I do to make it up to you?

I can either give you a glorious reward, or them a terrible punishment.

Franko el Derbi
Ministry of Apologies

y dont u go n kill urself?????????? that should make me feel better n u knoe wut? to come to think about it.......... i wasn't being selfish i wrote a story and i took the time to write one!!!!!!!!! ur not the only jerk who's busy u knoe

I'm sorry, you've gone back to making no sense again. Please turn that awesome spellchecker back on. I'm not sure who "Urself" is... They don't seem to be on the review staff.

Franko el Derbi
Ministry of Confusion

it wasn't poorly written!!!!!!! ok i knoe i went overboard w/ the exclaimation marks n shit and yea i didnt make them into paragraphs but its not poorly written compared to most ppl's stories on the fucking web and i think my spellchecker broke because i used it for the fucking story and it just blew up because they can't believe that the bastards volunteering for you guys won't accept my story

I have no doubt that your spell checker broke when you used it on that story.

Franko el Derbi
Ministry of Grammar