First, I really want to get a copy of the MindCandy DVD, but their page got slashdotted so it's offline. The only good thing about that is I got a nostalgia kick from the “NAID WILL RISE AGAIN” banner on one of the mirrors. But seriously, why can't these servers handle the load? I've been slashdotted and I've been farked and never had a problem…
The crazy script that's life today:
Bush: Iraq is in violation of the UN, he kicked out the weapons inspectors in 1998.Iraq: Well, you pulled them out, and they weren't inspectors, they were the CIA.
Bush: If you don't let them back in and obey the UN, we'll invade!
Iraq: Ok, ok, we'll let them in.
Inspectors: We haven't found anything yet, Iraq appears to be largely disarmed.
Bush: That's proof! If you can't find weapons, that means they must be hiding them! Britain and the US know it, too bad the UN doesn't.
Britain: Well, actually, we don't have any evidence either. Please wait to invade until we have evidence.
Bush: Who cares. We're invading with or without evidence, and with or without UN approval. You might think that makes us a rogue state, but let me make things clear. Me and Ashcroft have one thing to say to any who doubt us: WE REPRESENT GOD, YOU FUCK.
Inspectors: Honestly, we haven't found anything.
Bush: We know that Iraq bought aluminum tubing, that can be used to make nukes!
UN Nuclear Agency: No, those tubes aren't for that. They're for rockets.
Bush: He'll use those rockets to launch chemical attacks on our troops!
Worrier: If you're saying Saddam has chemical weapons, won't our boys be in danger?
Bush: No! We're giving them all experimental vaccinations, don't worry.
Military: Well, actually we don't have enough to do that.
Bush: Yeah, but we've got the best medics in the world. Let's Roll!
Military: To be honest, we don't have enough medics either.
Bush: I'm sure we can pay a private contractor to do it for us.
Worrier: But we can't pay for the war already!
Bush: No worries, Iraq has oil. We'll use that to pay to invade them.
Worrier: I hear that North Korea has nukes that can incinerate Los Angeles. Why are you focusing on Iraq?
Bush: Don't worry, we've got the missile defense shield.
Scientists: Well actually it doesn't work… But no worries, we'll just skip the testing phase, so hopefully no one will figure it out until it's too late.
India: Hey, we just got some nuclear missiles too.
Pakistan: Small world! We did too. What a wonderful world this will be! We're naming ours “Ghauri”, after the Muslim warrior that defeated India in the 12th century. Bring it on!!!
Other than that, I recommend checking out Jon Cameron Mitchell's the sex film project… Maybe there are some folks here who'd like to usher in what may well be the future of filmmaking.
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