MiL0 and I went to King Of Fools today and Tia (I have no idea if that's right; it's “tay-ah”) told her all about the petting zoo next to the cemetary where she spends her nights guzzling cheap tequila. Being the cold bastard I am, instead of taking her to the zoo, I picked her up and used her as a battering ram to move through the pride parade crowds.
Feeling starved for animal attention, she ordered a pizza and used it to lure a family of four raccoons down out of the trees. They actually ate it out of her hands… When she wasn't looking I threw handfuls of rocks at them to discourage them from ever coming down into the yard again (so don't worry BBQ'ers; they won't git you).
Post a Comment